Sunday, 16 November 2014

The Forest of Wander

Wander - to walk or move in an aimless way (Oxford English Dictionary)
[side note: thank you to my amazing English TA who enlightened me with this dictionary; literally the bomb dot com]

I am constantly in this forest: wandering, seeking, lost. I walk down the same trail. I see the same birds. The same trees. The same deer. The same sun.


Nothing ever changes.

But once in a while, when the sun shines brighter than normal, someone else walks down that same trail. I sit in the middle of the forest and notice vibrations resonating off of the leaf covered ground. I hear breaths. I hear eyes. I hear someone listening.

They walk further into the forest, and as they come closer, all I can think to myself is, they've gotta find me.




I jump up, I scream, I roar, I wave my hands simultaneously in the air, and all they do is stand right above me, looking straight, and walk by. They exit the forest, and I'm still here, left alone, in the same spot: with the same birds, and the same trees, and the same deer, and the same sun.



How will I get out of here?

---

There was actually this one day, when someone came through the forest and ran straight to me. I was so confused. No one's ever found me before, but this person happened to find me so instantly. The scary thing was that, they saw me, amidst the nature that surrounded us, and the dangers of all things real. Who is this person? I thought.

They picked me up and took me to another place, somewhere far, somewhere beautiful.



I got stuck there too.

So I got up, and wandered around myself, without a goodbye, and found the old spot that I used to sit in.

But it was different, and it was green, and it was large, and it was flat, and it was comfortable.

It was different: with the same sun, and the same deer, and the same trees, and the same birds.

How will I get out of here?





All Those Pretty Lights

A while ago, I was watching a few episodes of Pretty Little Liars to relax after a long week of school, and heard a pretty sick tune in the background of one of the scenes. I didn't think much of it for a while, thought it was cool, but I didn't bother searching it up, since my mind went into several different places, after watching the show.

Remember this episode? When Toby made a mix CD for Emily? It was this scene!
A few days later, I found myself scrolling down Twitter, to find that the actress in that scene of the show, posted a link to the song I heard. It was by an Indie artist named Andrew Belle. 
Not only is he my favourite Indie Artist now, but I've had the biggest crush on him for so long!
The song was called "All Those Pretty Lights".

I can't tell you how many times I searched up the meaning to that song, hoping I could understand what Andrew meant by each and every line that happened to consume my thoughts in an instant.

Floods of memories came crashing through, visions of the future came to life, voices started taking control of my mind, and all I could do was stop and listen. The moment I listened, the moment I stopped, was when I realized just how much I was really going through.
This cover art has meant so much to me these past few years.
Friendships were broken, hearts were wounded, heads were spinning, and chests were ripped open; people hoping for things to change without making a move.

-- this song came along, and changed the game. 

I didn't really think that one song could ever change anything for me, but this one definitely did. It took every boundary I had, and broke it. Every stage of my life comes along differently, and with each stage, the meaning of the song changes for me. 

I know this song was God sent, a message from Him, and every time I hear it, I know He's singing to me, telling me it'll all be okay.

What does it mean for you?